"Tell me something about yourself."

“Tell me something yourself”

Just about all of us know that this is a question we can expect to be asked in an interview or sales meeting, but how many of us have a confident, compelling answer? One we can back up with stories?

This week I had the pleasure of conducting an interviewing skills workshop with the very talented young apprentices in the Great Hartford Arts Council’s “Neighborhood Studios” summer arts program.  At the beginning of the workshop, I asked them all to jot down at least three adjectives about themselves that they would use in an interview. What they came up with blew my mind.  I share it with you here in the photo above.

Yes, that’s right, you see the word, “affable” (and the contributor knew what it meant).  A few of my favorites: put –together, resilient, determined, go-getter.  Every one of these young people had (at least) three adjectives at the ready to describe themselves. And not just any adjectives, their choices are descriptive, evocative, meaningful words.

Even more impressive, later in the workshop I asked them to think of an experience in their lives that would illustrate one of the words they’d used to describe themselves. Not more than five minutes later they were finished writing and the room was abuzz with small groups sharing their stories with one another. There is not a doubt in my mind that these kids will be super successful interviewees, super successful communicators and super successful people.

How about you? Do you have your three (or more) adjectives at the ready? Are they boring, sleep –inducing business-speak words, or are they juicy, descriptive words like those the Neighborhood Studios apprentices came up with? (And hey, you can borrow theirs, I’m sure they won’t mind.)

Once you have your describing words, do you have stories you can tell to prove what you claim? Do your stories have a beginning middle and end? Have you tried them out on someone to make sure they’re complete and clear?

If not, take an hour or two – or more and run through these exercises yourself.  The  payoff will be well worth it.  On your next interview or meeting you’ll be heard.

Why your presentation isn't coming out the way you thought it would

If you’re reading this, my guess is this has happened to you.  You’re about a minute and a half into your presentation when things start going wrong.  Maybe just slightly, uncomfortably wrong or maybe horribly this-can’t-be-really-happening wrong. Either way, you end the presentation feeling somewhere between a little let down and completely wrung out.  “How did that just happen?” you think to yourself, “It sounded so good in my mind.” Want to avoid this kind of unwelcome surprise in the future? Next time, make sure you are not doing the following:

1.  Running through the presentation ‘in your head’: Things sound great in your head. You’re the keynote speaker of your dreams, the smartest guy or gal in the room.  You’re uttering the pithiest, most hilarious, most insightful stuff ever said.  Except that you’re not hearing yourself saying it, you’re hearing it in your head. Nothing ever sounds the same in your head as it does coming out of your mouth.  In fact, you don’t really even know how it sounds at all until you hear it OUT LOUD.  OUT LOUD you’ll hear where you’re missing transitions, where you’re spending too much time on one point and not enough on another.  OUT LOUD you’ll find the right words to say. Oh, and OUT LOUD you’ll see how saying those words feels. Saying stuff in your head and saying stuff OUT LOUD are two completely different experiences. First of all, OUT LOUD you have to push air through your vocal chords and out of your mouth – which has to form different shapes depending on the words you’re saying. That requires energy, effort and skill.  Remember “Sally sells sea shells by the sea shore”?  How easily can you say it in your head?  How easily can you say it out loud? See? Lastly, let’s face it, when you’re running through your presentation in your head you can be easily distracted.  Something else (anything else) can easily take precedent and poof!, your presentation is replaced by thoughts of lunch, a meeting, a Facebook photo… This is why you must practice OUT LOUD.  In your head does not count.  Period.

2.  Reading from a script: I know, I know.  You want to be sure you don’t forget anything.  You don’t want to digress or get a fact or figure wrong.  Plus, (according to you) you’re not so eloquent.  Writing it down ensures you’ll be well-spoken, right?  Wrong.  Writing it down and reading from it ensures you’ll sound like you’re reading.  And unless you’re a playwright or script writer you’ll be delivering something that sounds like reading material, not like conversation. Even worse, it’s virtually impossible to be lively, dynamic and – most important – connecting when you’re reading.  Who cares if you repeat a word, or search for a word or even back track to a previous point to tag on something you forgot to say? As long as you’re looking at your audience and not reading from a script, they won’t care about any stumbles. And if you’ve practiced OUT LOUD there will only be minor stumbles anyway.  You’ll be speaking in real, everyday language, just as you would in conversation with friends or colleagues.  You’ll be communicating living ideas, not reciting from a dry (and most likely deadly) script. Instead of scripting every word, give yourself notes with keywords or at the most, short phrases.  These will keep you on track and focused, while not sacrificing the connection between you and the audience or the natural pace and vocabulary of your regular, lively unscripted speech.

3.  Relying on text heavy PowerPoint slides: This, combined with not practicing out loud, is probably the biggest detriment to presentations.  Frankly, if you practiced your presentation OUT LOUD odds are good you’d end up deleting just about all of the text.  You’d see that having all of those words up on the screen only caused distraction (and not only for you, for the audience as well).  Once you practice your presentation OUT LOUD you’ll find that you don’t need all of those words, you can remember what you want to say without them.  Bravo!  And thank heavens, because those slides were never ever meant to be your notes. Lots and lots of text on a slide does nothing but create a barrier between you and the lively connecting delivery of your message.

Don’t let any of these bad habits get in the way of your next presentation.  Use notes with simple key words or short phrases, remember that PowerPoint slides are there to aid the audience, not hold your copious notes.  And for goodness sake, practice OUT LOUD. You’ll be giving presentations that feel even better than you imagined in your head!  And you’ll be heard.

Dragging George

My late mother- in- law used to tell a great joke.  A man comes in after a day of golf, and his wife asks, "How was golf, honey?"  "Terrible." he replies. "On the third tee George dropped dead."  "Oh my Lord!  That's awful!"  the wife exclaimed.  "What did you do?" "Well," the husband sighed, "for the rest of the day it was; hit the ball, drag George, hit the ball, drag George."

Of course this joke always gets a laugh because it illustrates the obsession and single mindedness of some of the golfers among us.  But I got to thinking about it a different way.  What if we were giving a presentation we'd developed without our audience in mind?  We'd filled it to the brim with all of our insider jargon words and acronyms.  We described the inner workings of our doodads and thingamabobs in intricate detail.  We were sure to include every factoid we could find about our beloved product or service, our business, even ourselves.  We lovingly clicked through our massive deck of slides, smiling and smiling and feeling all aglow, proud as punch to be reading bullet after bullet about, well, us.

Then, when the big day comes, we stand in front of our audience and we begin our presentation.  Sure enough on about the 4th slide our "George" (the audience), drops dead, metaphorically speaking.  Realistically speaking, they simply stop listening.  Their eyes glaze over, they surf their blackberries and iphones.  Throats are cleared, restrooms are visited, seats are vacated.  And yet, on and on we go, hitting our presentation "ball" and dragging our audience along with us.

We know that what makes my mother in law's joke funny is that the golfer's priorities are all messed up.  The focus should have been (say it with me now) GEORGE!  That's right, just as our focus should be the audience, NOT ourselves, our product, our company.

The most important part of any presentation is the audience.  you want them ALIVE, engaged and attentive, nodding their heads in understanding and agreement.  They should be eagerly following you from "tee" (point) to tee.  Never ever should they be dead weight you're dragging through your presentation.  Remember George.  Never forget your audience.

give 'em the "why"

How many people reading this floss their teeth on a regular basis? Most people don’t. They know a generic “they” “should”, but they really don’t understand the benefit of flossing, so they skip it. I floss every single day. You know why? A million years ago, when I was about 24 my dentist said to me, “Debbie, you need to take care of your gums. We can always replace a tooth, but if your gums go, there’s nothing protecting your teeth, no way to anchor a bridge, you’re sunk.” I like my teeth, I need my teeth, and if one or two has to go, I want to know they can put in a reasonable facsimile, so I floss.

Sometimes in a persuasive presentation, we must provide the audience with the "why". Your product or service absolutely solves a problem for them, but it's a problem they don't know they have. If you explain to them first what their problem is, or could be, you've got them eating out of your hand when you get to proposing your solution. Not only that, they're grateful to you for seeing the oncoming train which would have nailed them if not for your alerting them. Now they not only see the value in your product or service, they see the value in their relationship with YOU.

Think about that the next time you're preparing a pitch. Oh, and floss everyday too, will ya?