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The amazing power of women

Sorry guys, it's not that I don't love you (and A LOT), and I'm not saying that there aren't more than a handful of you who have helped me over and over and over, (Marc Tannenbaum, David Roth and Michael "the saint" Grimes come to mind immediately) but this past week I've been struck by the resilience, brilliance, and enormous generosity of spirit of women.

Where to begin? Karan Spanard is a consultant for BNY Mellon Bank and contacted me a few months ago about working with a few of their presenters for the upcoming SIBOS conference in Amsterdam. The referral itself would have been enough, but she has shepherded me through the process in such an amazing giving way. Thank you and thank you and thank you can never be enough.

I attended one of Jane Pollak's "Remarkable Women" events last week and was blown away by every woman's eagerness to really LISTEN and offer positive, supportive suggestions. Looking around the room I could see in each of the women's faces an openness, an intense interest. Jane set the stage perfectly (and being surrounded by gorgeous Eileen Fisher clothing didn't hurt either). It was a magical night.

On Tuesday of this week I had lunch with Jody Ferrer uber-connector and owner of The Perfect Promotion. She invited Jessica from co-communications, whom I've been wanting to meet for almost a year now. Jessica, without even having met me, connected me with Execsense, a company in San Francisco for whom I've been doing webinars. In the short space of an hour we had solved (minor) issues for Jody, talked about all kinds of connections we can make for one another, sprinkled with hilarious stories about our kids and significant others.

After lunch I sat down with Marjorie Luke, president of the West Hartford Chamber of Commerce and talked about terrific speakers for her "Women who mean Business" speaker series. Heidi Michaels, a life and sports coach, and Lisa Wexler, a TOP radio personality came immediately to mind, as did my dear friend Dale Allen. So charged up was I after telling Marjorie about these women I don't even remember the drive home.

Brava! Ladies. Thank you ALL for energizing, inspiring and coming to my aid me every single day.

getting OUT

Having moved every year of my life as a kid ( no my dad was not in the military; it's a long boring story...) I am pretty comfortable in a room full of strangers, and I really like networking events. In fact, networking and speaking are the two main marketing methods I've used to build my business. They've worked so well that until last night I've been too busy with clients to attend any networking events this year. Last night reminded me why I love networking and why it's so important.

When you're in business for yourself it can be really lonely. When I'm panicking about something I'm doing it alone, and when something great happens I'm jumping up and down in my office alone. Neither one feels as bad or good as it would were I sharing the feeling with someone else. Unfortunately, as a "solo-preneur" you can feel like you're all BY yourself ; you forget that there are all kinds of great people out there just like you.

Last night I attended the Entrepreneurial Women's Network's Grand Networking event, and did just that. What a great night! I connected with friends and colleagues from Jessica Bram to Gillian Anderson to Jane Pollak to Peggy Garbus. I saw current and former clients like Rita Smircich and Dr. Ann Abram and Maryann Donovan and the"glitter fairy" Laurie Davis. I met interesting dynamic women like Holly Hurd and Bonnie Marcus (the evening's honoree). Rather than coming home tired I came home energized and inspired. Busy or no, I absolutely will not let months go by before my next outing. Getting OUT is absolutely a MUST for an extrovert solo-preneur like me.

Who wants a flawless diamond?

Recently I've been researching diamonds; the serious ones that adorn engagement rings. Learning about the 3 C's; color cut and clarity, and all the ways that diamonds are "graded". The idea is to own a diamond with as few flaws as possible. As close to "flawless" as you can get is the goal.
I'm thinkin' ,"Why would I want a flawless diamond?" I'm flawed. The magic of finding the person you belong with, the person you want to spend your life with, is that they don't mind your flaws. In fact, if you're really really lucky they may even LIKE your flaws. And you feel the same way about their flaws.
We are all flawed. Every one of us. I think that's what MAKES us beautiful. Certainly loving one another, flaws and all, is what makes love beautiful. Why not have a diamond that mirrors that?
p.s. I am now the proud proud owner and wearer of a flawed and beautiful diamond. Mounted on an engagement ring. Given to me by the love of my life, who loves me flaws and all.

what makes me de-loyal

This past Saturday, while running mindless errands I found myself devastated by a company to whom I have been a loyal customer for the past three decades. Well, actually I was devastated by a sister company of the one to whom I've been loyal.

I went to Banana Republic, the swanky sexy younger sibling of the GAP, to return two blouses I'd bought during the holidays. Standing at the register, confident that the return was merely a formality, (and with two pairs of pants in my arms to try on) I was informed by the woman behind the counter that I had purchased the blouses more than 30 days before and thus they were unreturnable. Period. No store credit (and i had paid for them with my beloved Banana Republic card) no nothin'. I was stuck with them. For life. After 30 days.

Stunned and incredulous I left the store, (after having deposited the pants I was about to try on at some display on my way out). For a solid hour I went about my other errands shaking my head and muttering, "I can't believe it." I worked at the Gap in the early 90s when my kids were tiny, and I remember a day someone came in and returned a pair of jeans he'd bought a YEAR before, but he had his receipt and we gave him his refund. 30 days???? are you kidding me???? during the holidays???

Almost a week later I am still shaken. My beloved GAP may very well become "dead to me now" as my Italian neighbor refers to those who've displeased him. For the life of me I can't figure out who in their right mind thought this would be a savvy business move. Why would I ever ever buy a gift for anyone there? If the recipient has a normal busy life (ahem) he or she may not be able to get to the store in 30 days. Certainly this aggressive return policy will not encourage any new customers to try their stuff. The penalty's too great.

I can only hope that within a very short time the powers that be at GAP Inc. will realize the error of their ways and change this woeful policy. Then maybe we can get back together. For the moment though, they're dead to me.

gratitude is IN at the Golden Globes

Watching the Golden Globes last night I was happily struck by the overwhelming gratitude of the winners. To a man (and woman) each winner expressed true heartfelt appreciation for not only the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, but for their producers, directors, fellow castmates and crew, their families and their work.

I think maybe a silver lining in the challenging economy of the last year and a half or so is that people are taking stock of what they do have and giving thanks. Having work and work that you love and are rewarded for doing is truly something worth cherishing. (and don't I know it.)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know; this is Hollywood and these are actors for crying out loud (I may be a HUMONGOUS Pollyanna but I hang out with a couple stark realists; you know who you are.) Still, gratitude it gratitude and I don't think theirs was manufactured of misplaced. And I, for one, found it utterly heartwarming.

do one thing

Today I celebrate having graduated from Jane Pollak's 6 month private coaching program. To say it has been life changing would be an understatement. I have truly shifted, reframed, and moved forward in GIANT STEPS in every aspect of my life. One of the biggest things I got from my coaching experience was the idea of "doing one thing". As an entrepreneur and single mother of three I was feeling overwhelmed at best and undone at worst by the mass and scope of some of the items on my "to do" list. we all have things we are better and worse at, and I, like most people, put off doing the things on the "worse at" list. Of course these are the very same things that have me up at three in the morning.
Jane helped me see that I only needed to tackle ONE thing a day; not the whole ginormous thing. One thing I could handle. One thing was doable. And even better, once I did the one thing I could feel GOOD about myself for the rest of the day instead of kicking myself around the block.
Amazingly, this whole DO ONE THING campaign has helped me make BIG strides in checking things off my "worse at" list. And I'm getting more sleep to boot.